is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
