They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Randomize
