Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
