is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
