Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
