those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
