Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
