My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
