Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
