Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
