do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
