This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize