plz talk dirty to me
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
