therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
What a dumb baby whore.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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