just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
