I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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