Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize