I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
why do cheetos always look like penises
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
