i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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