dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Of course I have a pirate flag
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize