i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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