She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
if i died would you start the facebook group?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
