Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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