Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
The feeling are messing with the penis
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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