just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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