Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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