we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize