one might say we're banned from that church
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
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