No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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