I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize