I must be too annoying 4 u.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
