He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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