i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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