Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
