just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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