You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
