Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
