I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
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