I don't think brook has ever known best
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize