Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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