Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize