i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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