Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
