great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
