We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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