plz talk dirty to me
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
