Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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