Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize