big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
