I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
